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Rants November 15, 2009

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1. David Bright tells me that Maine game wardens are concerned about the number of deer driving incidents they've observed during the hunting season. Game wardens say these hunters are endangering themselves and thus the wardens want to regulate this type of hunting. Deer driving is when two groups of hunters start at opposite ends of a hunting ground, fan out in two lines and then walk towards each other, driving deer into the middle of the group until one of the hunters can get off a shot. Seems to me that this type of hunting will eventually be self-regulating.

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2. Little gee-whiz fact here for you to consider. I bought some of those 1 ½ volt batteries that can be recharged. But when I charge them, they won’t take a full charge. When I asked one of the cognoscenti about it I was told that 1 ½ volt rechargeable batteries will only charge up to 1 14/ volts. Is this true? What can you tell me about rechargeable batteries? Are they just as good? I’ m humble at humblefarmer dot com.

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3. Would you like to brag about how much money you have --- how successful you are, without actually saying, “I have a lot of money?” One way of doing it is by being on a panel with your local hospital president, who earns $300,000 or so a year. Discuss on local television with your local hospital president, who earns $300,000 or so a year, what can be done to lower the cost of healthcare.

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4. I recently attended a meeting in Wakefield, Massachusetts where the host, who happened to be my cousin David Watts, invited everyone to stand for a moment of silence. I can create the same effect by simply standing before an audience and telling one of my dry stories.

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5. On my last trip to Denver I noticed that Fox television was playing in all of the airports. Do you think this is fair? Don’t a few educated people use airports, too?

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6. Someone was telling me about a book called Patients Beyond Borders. This book gives you detailed information on the best hospitals and treatment centers in more than 40 countries worldwide, plus data on local and international accreditation, health travel planners, accommodations, and more. We read that operations can cost from 30 to 80 percent less in accredited hospitals abroad. Of course, you could also give up sweets, beer and smoking, and then perhaps it might be a long time before you need a hospital.

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7. We are not as provincial as we used to be. Americans have learned that if they need an expensive operation, it just might be cheaper to get on an airplane and fly half way around the world to have it done. Because there is so much money to be made in sick people, most people now know that the United States has one of the worst health care systems in the world. And who is going to change anything that is making too many people very rich? Some young people have also discovered that you will not be in debt for most of your life if you get your college education in Europe. A college education in many countries in Europe is practically free. So, go abroad for an operation. Go abroad for your college education. Oh, Yes --- there is a catch with getting into a college in Europe. You have to prove that you are smart enough to get through it.

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8. Friends from several different states were sitting around a table at a hotel in Denver and the topic of conversation was the language one hears on talk shows. One woman said she continually hears them say, “Please give me a sense of what you’re saying.” I suppose that is an improvement over, “Huh?”

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9. As hard as it is for me and certainly you to believe, I was asked to conduct a one-day writing workshop for talented high-school students who signed up to learn more about writing from The humble Farmer. The night before I asked an experienced newspaper man what I should tell these kids. He said, “Write from the heart, write what you know and do your research.” And when I thought about this I realized that most of what I write is the result of extensive research. In other words, either you or another one of my smart friends usually tells me what I should say.

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10. If school teachers have problems, they have no one to blame but themselves. My wife Marsha taught for 25 years. My brother taught for 27 years. When my brother and I started college you could buy a house with one year's teaching salary. Now teachers have to work five or more years to buy the same house. Forty years ago the earning power of working people was four or five times better than it is today. So, who do you think is to blame? The people who are willing to work for slave's wages? Are teachers not permitted to discipline kids? Who is to blame? The teachers. If every teacher stayed home and refused to work until there were some changes, don’t you think they could exact some necessary reforms from society? But teachers are not organized. There are too many, like my wife's kid, who are willing to work for nothing and be pushed around by a system that is going to continue to pay less and less as it continues to demand more and more. Years ago it was my observation that it was rich kids from away who were driving down teachers' salaries in Maine. Rich kids know they are going to inherit a pile someday so money isn't important. They want to come to Maine and play teacher. They are extremely bright kids. So Maine school boards are in the same position as an American company that has gone south and is delighted to find countless capable workers willing to work for peanuts. I taught for 4 or 5 years by default but I wasn't strong enough to do it. And I was the highest paid teacher in the district with a masters plus 60 grad hours which was as high as the scale would go or they would have paid me for a masters plus 90. Which points out another curious thing. Teachers aren't paid by their ability. They are paid by how many hours they were able to survive in grad school. How much longer can we continue to run our schools like a business?

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11. Ok. You’ve got me. You know very well what would happen if teachers refused to enter a classroom until their wages were restored to what they were in 1965. The business community would do the same thing they do with every other dirty low-paying job that you and I don’t want to do --- and fill those teaching positions with illegal immigrants.

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12. Someone remarked that our new Maine State Prison is full. If that is true, is it not to be expected? Matter always expands to fill the allotted space. The proof can certainly be seen piled all around your office or in your garage or workshop. Or even in the waistline of your pants. My friend Davis has a solution. Davis says that instead of building a bigger jail, you prisoners only get to spend 8 hours sleeping in your cell. The other 16 hours you would be required to be somewhere else. That way a jail could accommodate three times the number of prisoners that it does today. Davis is a businessman. Do you think we should run the prison like a business?

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13. Did you hear that the Knox County Sheriff's Department is investigating what it calls a counterfeiting operation, in which phony $20 bills are being circulated in Rockland? Police say the money looks almost real but in fact is stage money, not real currency. Obviously some bad actors passed through Rockland.

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